This week I'm all about brands. Don't get me wrong, brands are great and can help you establish what clothes and styles you like, but beware! It is easy to fall into the worst trap of all – becoming a brand whore. For some people this is just a myth, they think brand whores only come out every second full moon to feed on people's Zespy's and Herschel bags. But I can tell you right now that they are 100% real, and I have seen far too many in my life.
This is my favourite definition of a brand whore and it sums it up pretty well: a brand whore is someone who buys and prominently displays name brand products (or products that feature large corporate logos) under the belief that such loyalty to a label or corporation brings prestige to their otherwise lack of taste, regardless of the actual quality or value of the products. With this in mind, there are really two types of Brand Whores, those that only wear clothes from one label, and those that wear clothes from only a select few high fashion brands, never associating themselves with the 'lesser brand plebs.'
Honestly, being a brand whore is nothing to be proud of. If anything it just shows your lack of individuality and style, but hey, that's just my opinion. Obviously it's common knowledge that some brands are considered more stylish than others, but that definitely doesn’t mean that you should find one brand you like, and abuse your wear of that label to show off your die-hard loyalty. For me personally it's not like I extensively plan out my outfits each day because ugh, that sounds like way too much of a commitment, but I do try to wear different brands so I’m not wearing more than 1 or 2 items from the same label.
It becomes very apparent at parties that most brand whores come equipped with some sort of radar, which helps them detect who’s wearing their favourite brands. They are always quick to compliment these people on their outfits, but it’s almost a double-edged sword because you will only receive a compliment about the brand, thus showing off the brand whore's own 'brand awareness.' Thinking about the clothes I own, while I do like certain brands, half the clothes I wear are from random ass brands I don't even know how to pronounce, picked up from the bargain bins at op-shops which is probably why I don't get complimented – not because the clothes often have that faint smell of piss (cue Macklemore's thrift shop).
I guess in closing, being a brand whore isn't the worst mistake you could ever make (Camo print is the worst mistake you could ever make, but I’ll talk more about that later) and it's easy enough to fix. Just think to yourself, do you really want to be known as 'that guy' at the party, that brand elitist who won't venture outside their little brand bubble, latching on like a limpet to the current fashion trends? I think not...
And to finish it all off here is a deep and meaningful poem I wrote about brand whores.
Stay classy San Diego,
Ode to Brand Whore
He's a brand whore
With his brands galore
Brands a more
All these clothes from that single brand store
Wearing so much of a brand it'll drop your jaw
He goes to parties, looking to score
He walks through the door
Thinking girls are gonna hit the floor
You got nothin’ on him even with that juicy couture
Because he's got more style than good home decor
But in reality he's just a real eye sore